Why Some People Deserve the “Block” Button: Social Self-care

When we think about self-care, we typically think about spa days and overnight getaways. Self-care does not always need to be elaborate, however, it does need to be intentional! 

Have you ever heard of social self-care? 

This means being mindful of the people who are in our circle on a regular basis. It helps us manage our time and energy. During the current pandemic, social distancing gives this a whole new meaning.  That being said, this is a great time to look at our social circles and determine the role that each individual plays and whether they should be playing any role at all in OUR story.  

It is important to make sure that the people  we are giving our time and energy to are also people who are contributing value in our lives and supporting who we are authentically. Not everyone in our lives can be everything we desire them to be but they can add value. Who are the kind of people we want in our social circle-- or don’t want? 

We want to have a supportive group or network of relationships that not only add value to our lives but also those who we can bring value to in return.

Keeper:

These are people who support our emotional well-being and maybe even provide some of our physical needs. These are the people who genuinely care about us. Spending time with our “keepers” leaves us feeling uplifted and energized. 

Consumer:

These are the people in our lives who actually take energy from us. Our interactions with them leave us feeling  exhausted and  drained. They are in it for what they can extract from you. We  may even find ourselves dreading interaction with them.

Fair-weather:

These are the people who will cheer for us and be there only when it is  convenient. They don’t want to put in too much work or get their hands dirty.  These people may not be “consumers” but they don’t necessarily add value. 

Associate:

These are the people that support our professional or business endeavors.  However, these may not be people that can provide us with any social or emotional support of any kind. There can be confusion if we mistakenly think professional relationships are more than they are. Manage the energy you put in until you see evidence that they are “keepers.” 

These are just a few categories that people fall into within our social circles.  Being mindful of how we spend our time and energy is an important step as any other in caring for ourselves entirely.